An answer to my prayers...

"This too shall pass.." - My mother

I wasn't always adrift. I didn't always live in the valley. Once, I was on the mountaintop with God, and everything seemed so clear, so infused with life and hope and joy. I felt God's presence every moment, and He brought so many things to my attention that my eyes couldn't see. I wish I didn't have to leave, but life derives its meaning from a sojourn in the valley. Before I left the mountain, I prayed, "Lord, cure me of my pride. Soften my heart to those who call the valley their home." I thought it would be an easy lesson, but the wonderful thing about God is that He's not afraid to teach you, even if its a painful thing to learn.

For many months after leaving the mountaintop, I thought it was my fault, that I had done something wrong to force me to leave the heights and come crashing to the depths. I lay awake, restless and longing for more, aching to feel God's hand over me again.

I feel so worn, yet perhaps that's not so bad as I once thought, for although my strength is waning, my pride is as well. I strain my eyes to see in the dark, losing hope. I call out to God, and He lights a single star in the heavens for me, a beacon. He teaches me that this faith is about so much more than feeling, but about living out the reality we know. He is never so far that He cannot reach you. Have faith - He would never stand back unless He knew that you were strong enough. Even when you doubt, He believes in you.